Positive Role Models
Versus erroneous role models
Most people, if not everybody has a role model- somebody they aspire to. Someone to look up to and admire. Someone chosen as an example to emulate. Someone who possesses the positive qualities one would like to have.
Our first role models were often our parents. As young babies or children we naturally look up to our parents, and absorb or imitate their behaviour. If we find that our parents are not strong examples of how to be happy, free and successful in life, then we will look to others as substitute role models.
It is all part of developing as a human being to try and find happiness. It is about finding out who we are, and discovering a happy loving role we can play in life. So that we can move forward in a healthy positive direction. Anxiety can often occur when we are going in the wrong direction in life. A path going backwards and not forward. A path which is not paved with love.
In this day and age a role model is often someone selected erroneously from the media- like a famous celebrity that one can relate to or aspire to be like.
Whilst growing up at school, I played a game of identifying and naming people's role models- especially teachers. I noticed that each teacher emulated a famous person, in the way they would talk, teach or behave publicly. Whether it would be a famous radio personality, actress, comedian or TV presenter.
One teacher secretly idolized an obscure radio personality, who I also enjoyed listening to. He had the same moustache and appearance, would drive the same Harley Davison motorcycle, support the same football team and even talked the same. I noticed that this was the same for each teacher, with their different idols. I named the role models of 10 different teachers and also of my friends.
I told a few of my friends about my theory. One of them did not believe me, so he approached this teacher directly in a laughing way and said, "Do you know ....". There was complete shock and silence from the teacher. The illusion of that teachers world nearly crashed. The teacher became defensive and aggressive, "why I should I know him?". My friend said, "I don't know... it's this guy!" and pointed at me. My friend was later questioned by a senior teacher, and then came back to me and said, "You were right, it must be true".
Some people's role models are not real people. Some of them are comedy film characters or even cartoon characters. The idols therefore provide no skills or experience of a real happy loving life. People therefore do not have a solid goal in terms of what they want to be like (i.e a loving member of family and society) or where they want to go in life (what will make them happy and their future life successful). The whole world is completely lost like this, confused about who they are what they want to be like.
There is confusion as to what positive success in life actually means. Some people think success means to be rich and famous. To be almighty and to abuse that might. Or to get one over on their enemies. Or to have everybody envy them. Or to sleep with a thousand women. This is not true happiness and success. People can have very shallow goals and ideas about success.
Having an ignorant or selfish ideal never brings happiness. Neither can any action toward any selfish goal. Having ignorant or selfish ideals may only amplify your experience of fears, separation, insecurities and negative emotions. You may drift father away from true love, true meaning and true purpose in life. And where there could have been success in life, there is failure. Because all your energy, wishes and attention are in the wrong place.
True success is to achieve the true goal of life on earth. To find the true purpose why you were born. To know and experience who you are.
At the highest level, experiencing who you are is the same as knowing, experiencing and loving other people. When you are one with your Self you are essentially one with all others as well- because we are all anchored in the same presence. We are all made of the same thing- God's love.
True spiritual happiness may be equal to how much happiness you create in others. How much satisfaction you create in your parter, family, children and the world. Happiness is measured by how many people are being helped, healed and supported by you in every way. You see your love reflected back to you in the world, and that brings the highest joy. Happiness and success can also be found in a simple life, honest work and a loving happy family that bring freedom in life.
Sometimes we are innocent in that we only try to focus on what we love and makes us happy. People usually tend to identify with people (role models) that have a similar weaknesses. Some idols have our weaknesses, but they also have what we may consider to be success in life. So relating to that person may help you accept and love yourself. But the idols may also have similar blocks and erroneous beliefs, behaviors and goals. A blind can not lead a blind, and neither can an erroneous role model.
Each person such as these teachers, were living in a state of pretence, instead of their eternal presence. Having a very shallow concept of their own being. If you look carefully you will see that some people may chose the most ridiculous people to base their personality and behavior on to the extend that it is laughable.
Questions to ask. Is your role model a real person? Or a fake manufactured or pretence person? Is he or she happy in life, enlightened and healthy, peaceful and with a happy family? Or is he or she someone who is a drunk, unhappy, fake, lost in life or a criminal?
Whether you are spiritual or not, your role model is a kind of guru. Through the metaphysical physiology of samyama you are becoming like the object of your concentration. You are continuously becoming like your role model. So be careful who you chose to look up to.
Most role models do not help move you in a positive direction in life. A person's role model says a lot about how destructive, lost and far away from God they are. A person's role model shows how they are going in the complete wrong direction in life.
If you are spiritual, the ultimate questions may be, "Can your role model bring you home to God? Can he or she dispel the darkness in your life? Can your role model help you full-fill your true purpose in life?" If yes then you are fine. But if not you may be completely lost in life. Who is your role model?
Most of my role models have been loving personalities and healers. All people I currently respect and look up to- they are all One with God. I look up to people like Jesus, Kaleshwar, Shirdi Baba, Babaji, and Vishwanada. So I am becoming like them and going in that direction in life. I am becoming one with God. I am accumulating increasing amounts of love until oneness with God occurs. Then I may live eternally as an loving and strong example myself.
Examples of erroneous and non-positive role models are tv soap characters, presenters, comedy actors, cartoon characters, pop stars and wrestlers etc. They do not exist and are manufactured.
A friend of mine had many inspirations. They all seemed to have bald heads, which is one reason why he could relate to them on a personal level. One was a famous cartoon character and one was a violent drunk from a depressing tv soap opera. So it is was not surprising that he too was a drunk and going downhill in life on a path of self-destruction.
Another friend of mine idolized a gangster rapper who got killed. This person ended up spending several years in prison and once told me that he cannot see himself living over the age of 25, which coincidently is the age the gangster rapper got killed.
Some people are choosing extreme wrong role models and thus a wrong path in life, which is leading to unnecessary suffering and self destruction. All because of non-positive role models.
The whole world is completely lost like this, not knowing who they and what their true goal is. And that is why we need living examples of love and success in the world. Real success means a happy, holistic, loving life. Maybe to have a loving happy family. Maybe to be enlightened- to be one with God- to be someone who helps and supports the needs of many. It is all about values of life.
The true guru may be the ultimate role model for reaching God, and for reaching the ultimate goal in life. He is the one to show you how to be loving, enlightened and successful. To show you a glimpse of your true identity and home in God. To help you become a person of huge love. In order to love, help, share, heal and make happy. To find your solid true home in God for eternity.
It maybe time to drop your present role models and re-evaluate your path in life. A path of love is the true goal of life. Maybe you have, or will find a true guru, somebody to bring you to God on a path of love.
Here is a very important point. The lesson here is to make God your only role model. If you make God your only positive role model, then you find your own unique and divine role and personality for eternity- to be your Self- with your own unique love and talents.